Beaufort SC
“Anger and folly walk hand in hand.” -Benjamin
Franklin
“Using anger to solve problems is like using a fan to organize
paperwork.” – Unknown
The word anger covers a spectrum from mild irritation to intense
fury. This survival instinct that triggers adrenaline, increases
heart and breathing rates and triggers hormones is one of our most primitive
emotions. In situations of split-second survival response, the
same things are triggered but we do not have time to develop a tantrum. Therefore
I can think of no use for it besides intimidation – which is one of the least
effective social tools.
If we are to be happy and function in society, we must get a
handle on our anger and our responses to it. Un-expressed anger causes
chemical and emotional changes that poison us from the inside out. There
are many clinics, articles and books written on managing anger and techniques
for dissipating the rage. But is not better to just avoid it to
start with? Observing ourselves to realize how destructive it is
provides motivation for a solution.
Anger is our reaction to fear that we are not going to get
something we want, or are going to lose something we have. I
personally have not found a situation yet where this was not the case. Once
we understand this second step is clear – each time we get angry, we train
ourselves to honestly assess why we are afraid. It takes a bit of
practice, but it becomes habit soon. To the extent that we address
that fear, that particular phobia loses its power over us. It does
not take long working this regimen to eliminate the vast majority of fears that
trigger our anger. Soon it becomes a rare event that we allow
ourselves to be manipulated into this harmful emotion. Then we are healthier physically
and spiritually, and we spend a lot less time cleaning up chaos we have
created. This time will be well spent developing social tools more
sophisticated than stones and clubs.
Today, may I remember to treat the illness rather than the
symptom.
Have a great Wednesday !!
David
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