Not Good Enough?

Strathy Hall; Richmond Hill GA

“Shame is the most powerful master emotion.  It is the fear that we’re not ‘Good Enough.’”  -  Brene Brown

“It is the shame of fools that try to hide wounds that have not healed.”  -  Horace

     If we reach the point that we have decided to grow up and honestly live life, we find we first have to deal with our guilt.  This is usually hidden behind multiple layers of rationalization and often further veiled by obsessive or addictive habits, but once we break the veil of our ego these things come out relatively easily.  If we can muster the courage, we go back through our life and square accounts with those we have stolen from, short-changed or harmed by our actions.  When we get to this point we feel a lot of freedom for a while, but sooner or later some of those nagging voices of negativity that constantly tell us we are unworthy start to assert themselves again.  If we have moved beyond obsessive behaviors we have to face these voices head on.  These are the voices of shame, and they are much more pervasive and difficult to root out than the voices of guilt.

     If we had parents who were caught up in their own drama, we heard their voice from an early age informing us of all the areas we fell short of THEIR ideal.  After all, most parents think that children are a personal possession rather than a unique spirit whom they have the short-term privilege of showing this world.  We hear other voices in the form of peers and siblings – often cruel in their judgmental statements about where we fall short.  This paves the way for spouses, and little wonder that by this time we might think verbal abuse is normal.  On top of this heap we have the constant background noise of advertising, constantly showing us some false ideal that we “can only measure up to” if we “purchase their product.”  It adds up to a huge heap of obscene drivel that has us convinced that we are somehow inadequate.

     The most common course is one of action – we find that giving up the insanity of material pursuit and living life as a steward and a servant bring much relief and meaning.  Over time we can create a legacy of integrity through the performance of esteemable acts that bring a sense of self-worth.  But at some point we must be rid of the notion that our path here is somehow judged by others opinions or our own harsh criticisms of ourselves.   We have to come to realize that we are perfectly suited for the lessons we are here to learn; that we have everything we need just as we are.  This certainly isn’t an easy step in our development, but it is necessary if we are to move beyond petty illusions and begin to see all the amazing opportunities this life has laid at our feet.

Today, may I be grateful that I am.

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Have an awesome Tuesday !!

David